“To anyone enduring a depressive episode: it’s okay. You’re not being lazy or selfish. Your productivity doesn’t define or devalue you. You’re coping. You’re doing the best you can, and that’s okay.”
I’m not exactly sure who said this, but that small passage is something I’ve needed all my life. And to be completely honest, it’s something that I will still struggle to believe for many years to come. Not only am I a perfectionist, I’m also someone who can be very critical of herself. Whenever I’m feeling sad, it’s easy to be annoyed at myself for not being productive. It’s harder still to be kind to myself, and say, “It’s okay, there’s always tomorrow”. It’s harder to not talk myself down, and call myself things like ‘useless’ and ‘weak’ for feeling too sad to complete tasks I set myself to complete.
And surely I am not the only one in the world in the world who is like this.
Surely there are many more of you out there.
This is why I want to talk about self-care. Because it should be mind boggling, as to how we can be so understanding towards others in these sort of situations, yet be so harsh on ourselves.
I read this passage that spoke to me, and I want to share it all with you. It’s written by someone who goes by the name Kirti G, and like us who write in this blog, Kriti wants to show others with their words, that they too are not alone.
“Self care isn’t always pretty, it’s not always candles and a bathtub full of roses, sometimes it’s forcing yourself to get out of bed and dragging yourself, sometimes it’s the pep talk you give to yourself or the quick cry in the corner. Sometimes it is convincing yourself to do all these things you should be doing but you have no will whatsoever, sometimes it’s cutting some ties no matter how precious they were, sometimes it’s the bitter medicine you need to give yourself. Self care isn’t always pretty but it’s so worth it.”
I want to end this post by saying we should be kind to ourselves, the way we are to our family, to our friends and to strangers, when they tell us they’re having a bad day. Treating ourselves with kindness is just as important as treating others with kindness.
What are your experiences when it comes to this? I’d love to know! Also, I’ll be sharing a few of my personal tips on self-care in my next post – May 18th. So stay tuned!
Lots of love,
Nuur El Huda