Fear will Lose

Trigger warning: This post contains a brief mention of anxiety and minor depression.

 

Is anyone else having a hard time believing that it’s already March? This year is flying by, and like many of you I made some goals for myself at the start of the year. I’m not sure why I do this to myself every year because I never stick with them for very long and at the end of the year I’m always mad at myself for not having done more of the things I wanted. So this year I made my goals more attainable and only made goals that truly mattered. The hardest goal I made for myself is also the most important.

Let Peace Win.

I’ve had anxiety for as long as I can remember and I’m tired of it controlling me. I’m tired of it defining me. It (along with some minor depression), like to eat the joy from my life and I’m done letting them. This year my goal is to take back control, which is much easier said than done, but that doesn’t mean I’m not trying.

I’m working on not letting my insecurity get to me, and when my brain starts to run and think of all of the potential worst case scenarios I try to stop it and remind myself that those things aren’t likely to happen and it doesn’t do any good to dwell on them. I’ve started using a planner and adding things to my to-do lists that are attainable and easy so that no matter what I will have something to cross off my list. The biggest thing I’m trying to do is remind myself to find joy in the little things in life, and remember that there are always things to be thankful for.

One of the small things I started this year that has made a difference is deciding to focus more on what I have done than what I haven’t. For example, when I cross things off my to-do list I highlight them so they stand out more. For bigger accomplishments, or things I really want to  remember I bought a jar and started filling it with things I’ve done this year. This could be anything from getting a different hair cut to going to a concert. You could also add projects you finished like cleaning out your closet or maybe you finished writing a draft of your book. It’s totally up to you what you put in there. Then anytime you feel like you haven’t done enough you can look at the jar and see those slips of paper and feel a little better about it.

Even though I have anxiety, it is not the only thing I am. I love music, dancing, and eating raw cookie dough (even though I know it’s not the safest thing to do). I read and write, and spend way too much time binge watching shows on Netflix. I put off cleaning my house a little too often, and I don’t spend as much time in prayer as I should.

I joined this blog in hope that I might help someone else that is fighting the same battle I am. If you have anxiety and/or depression know that you aren’t the only one and know that there is hope. Progress probably won’t be an overnight change and that’s okay! Just stick with it and count every achievement no matter how small it may seem.

Love,

Peace Will Win

 

 

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11 thoughts on “Fear will Lose

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  1. So some months ago I was really depressed and having a horrible day. My friend came over, asked if I wanted brownie batter, walked into the kitchen, made up a bowl of brownie batter, and we stood there with spoons and ate the entire thing between the two of us.

    I felt a lot better after that.

    Liked by 5 people

  2. Like you, I suffer from anxiety as well. It is extremely soul consuming, and degrading of everything that you are for so long, but only until you stop giving it power. It is not an easy thing to do, but it is not impossible. Keep moving, love, and you’ll get where you want to be. 💛

    Liked by 5 people

  3. Peace Will Win, even though I’m sorry that you struggle with anxiety and depression, I am so thankful and amazed at how you’re fighting it. The ideas to highlight your accomplishments and keep them in a jar are such great ways to help yourself stay positive. I might even try them myself to stay motivated and on-track. (I have trouble staying focused sometimes, so I’m starting to implement to-do lists. It’s hard focusing when your head’s full of ridiculously loud thoughts and ideas, you know?)

    Also, don’t you ever let anyone tell you not to eat cookie dough. If they are, it might be time to find some new friends. You don’t need that kind of negativity in your life. 😉

    Liked by 3 people

  4. I also battle with depression and anxiety. I’ve been journaling just small points about the good and the bad of days and that’s helped me. Thanks for sharing!

    storitorigrace.blogspot.com

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  5. The positivity in your post is heart warming. I love the things you’re doing to help yourself. Especially having a lit of things so t hat you can always cross one off. I too may adopt your ways because falling into a pit that feels like you’re making no progress is hard.

    The worst of my anxiety (at least for the time being) has passed, but I do remember how it felt. I felt as if it would never relent, but it did. So please keep up what you’re doing and I’m sure one day it will relent for you too.

    Like

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